Caleb's Profile

Well, I was going to try and conjure up a wildly creative first blog post but I decided that I would answer the questions that my counterpart posed. I, of course, will do so in a much funnier and interesting fashion.

1) Why are you attempting this crazy, drunken project of trying every brewery in Colorado?

This project to me was about a couple of different things, explained in no real order, just what comes to me first.
1. There are a few really great things that this life has to offer. These include (but are not limited to) food, friends, sex, traveling, and booze (I like that I have a list within a list that is within a list). To deny yourself any of these great things is criminal in my opinion. The sheer joy that these simple things bring to life makes all the tedious day-to-day crap that one has to put up with bearable. I will never in my life understand people that say things to me like "Going to another country scares me", or "I will never try (insert food that has not been "Americanized")." While it is cliche, variety is the spice of life, along with Lowery's seasoning salt. This little adventure will give me the chance to do all of these things (except the sex... unless I get him really drunk) with one the best and funniest people I have ever known. I will get to travel around Colorado, which for those who are uneducated, is the greatest part of our fair country. I will get to eat at different places, stay in cheap motels or in a tent, and most importantly, I will get to drink all the bounty of beers that Colorado has to offer and see if they live up to my preexisting bias that the New Belgium Brewery is the single greatest place on this planet. Which is a lovely segue to point, the second.
2. I loves me some New Belgium beers. As with J, I grew up in Fort Collins. To give you an example of how great a town Fort Collins is and how great New Belgium beer is, I am about 98% sure that had Jesus thought about it, he would have had the sense to be born in Fort Collins and would have flipped the three wise men the bird when they brought their frankincense and myrrh and told them to get him a 1554 (this being ironic in that they were currently in the year 1 and 1554 would not come around for another... many years). Later on on in life he would have performed one of his first miracles by converting water into Fat Tire. In my home, I have an extensive collection of New Belgium shirts, hats, posters, beer signs, scarves, lip balm, bottle openers, decals, thong underwear, lube, etc. What I am hoping to discover, is a place within this fair state that can even give New Belgium a run for their money. If I find even one place like that in Colorado, I will be amazed but I will be happy that I get to expand on my wardrobe.

2) What's your goal here?
Well, I kinda already answered this question J. Way to go Captain Redundant. You always say the same thing over and over, just reiterating the same tired thought, it's like you can't stop repeating yourself in a manor that expresses your original point.
I will make something else up. I guess another goal is to do something that I will remember for the rest of my life. Something that I can look back on and remember fondly when I am burdened with the pressures of children, work, marriage, dementia, and dementia. I may be romanticizing this a bit, but I get the feeling on the start of this that this could turn into a magical moment in my life. Even if it does not turn out how I expected, the feeling I have now is worth it all the way. It's wonderful to be at a point in my life when I can embark on something like this and I plan on embracing it. Even the dreaded trip to the middle of South Eastern Colorado (the forgotten zone) to hit the one lone brewery there.

3) Favorite beer?
While I fully support J and his selection of the St. Bernardus Prior 8, my favorite beer has to be the 1554 from New Belgium. Like many foolish kids in their late teens to early 20's, I secretly only really liked lighter beers that had little flavor. Outwardly I would profess my love for darker and more "manly" beers like Guiness or other porters or stouts. In reality, I never really enjoyed those until I tried 1554 for the first time. It is a wonderfully complex Enlightened Black Ale that weighs in at 5.6% ABV. It was the first beer where I sought out the different aromas and flavors that it offered. It opened my eyes to all the things that beer had to offer besides the pleasant feeling I got after drinking 8 or 9 of them.

4) Since I already answered my favorite Colorado beer, I will subject myself to potential humiliation by listing some of my guilty pleasures when it comes to beer. Let me say though, almost all beer has something to offer. To me, beer snobs are like any other snob. Be it music, wine, cars, culture, etc. Pull your head out of your ass and just enjoy life. That being said, even I feel a bit guilty about enjoying some of these.
1. Coors Light. I loooove drinking this on a hot summer day or when I am out doing something like golfing.
2. Red Beers. The combination of tomato juice and beer. Sounds gross and worthy of scorn. I dig it.
3. The occasional Pabst Blue Ribbon. While I am fully aware that this is the go-to beer for hipsters. I do not enjoy this beer on an ironic level. In fact, most of the time I don't enjoy it at all. But now and then, I have one and then quickly consume several more. Then I go back to (correctly) hating it.

So there you have it. A small peek into my mind that is often swimming in carbonated malt beverages. I hope you enjoy this blog. If others have undertaken a similar journey, let us know so we can read about your trip and subsequently mock it with how much better ours will be.